Murder He Wrote

My Blackberry charger went missing from my office on Monday. I went to office after my appointment and found that my charger was no longer in my room. With a phone that was already running low on battery, I got annoyed that my charger went missing. I tried being civil and asked around if anyone saw or took my charger for which no one said they did. So, how did my charger go missing?

I then thought that I may have left it at home or in my car by mistake, though I was one hundred percent sure that it wasn't the case. Just to give the benefit of doubt, I decided to check in my car and at home. After searching in every nook and cranny, it was still no where to be found. As a security requirement, I then needed to file a complain over the issue. And for the sake of formality since I've got a manager who is a cunt trapped in a guys body, I dropped him an email notifying him about the missing charger and asked if I should file a complain. His exact words replied to me was you may file a complain if you want to. Interesting isn't it? It is now my choice if I want to obey the company policy or not.

Just when I thought that that was bad enough for the week, another drama had to unfold today. There are a couple of characters involved in this episode, and the cast list is made up of yours truly, a course mate who is my assignment partner (A) and a cunt who is also a course mate but has no more value other than being a mere bitch (B). 

We had an assignment due today and A and I only started working on it like yesterday as we only got the question the day before. The arrangement was for me to pass my part to A in order for her to compile and print it out. As per the arrangement, I completed my part this afternoon and emailed it to A for her compilation and printing.

Later, I received a message from A saying that she passed the file to B as B volunteered to print out the assignment. In addition, B convinced A to not attend class today but instead go visit A's grandmother as she isn't doing well. A is in a position where she can't afford to miss classes as she would then be barred from exams, but B told her that she will sign the attendance on behalf.

So, here I am at seven in class waiting patiently for my printed assignment to arrive. There was no sign of B until about eight. And when she came, my assignment didn't have a cover page nor was my name nad A's name printed on. When I asked B about the cover page, she told me that A didn't give her. I was like what the fuck?! Since you were so concerned about your friend earlier, why couldn't you do a cover page for her, after all you did one yourself. And to make matters worse, when I asked this bitch why was she so late, she told me that she was delayed because she had to go out to print A's and my assignment.

Now I'm conveniently at fault for this bitch to arrive late. Like I fucking asked you to print it out. You volunteered you bitch! It is bad enough that the content of the assignment was below acceptable as it was done at the very last hour, but to have that is presented in such a crappy manner just made the whole thing worse.

I swear I could feel my rage build up then but I was trying very hard to keep cool. And this bitch had to irk me further by sitting next to me and she had to annoy me further. I managed to keep cool this time around. I will know what I need to do the next around. Murder I wrote...

Weekend?

Where on earth did my weekend go? I was waiting for it since Monday and the bloody weekend just disappeared over two days. I don't feel rested at all :(

For the first time, I was on time at the airport, so unfair that I wasn't flying but instead fetching my brother from the airport. I need to self discipline myself so that I punctual everytime I fly else it's only a matter of time before I see my flight take off when I reach the airport. And, I had to fetch him in the morning.

Not enough, one of my clients gave me a call while I was still having my therapeutic sleep and I have no idea what the fuck i said to him over the phone, but the email that followed suit made me work all Saturday. Like what the fuck is that? How can you con someone to agree to do work for you on a weekend, it is so not right.

After sorting all the mess, I met up with some of my buddies for a Bacardi overdose. Four people and four bottles is just not called for, especially in a pub and not a club. The bang on the head this morning just wasn't well, worth it.

The freaking hangover lasted all day. And the heat just made things worse. I had to take multiple shower to cool my body and trying to take a nap just wasn't happening. I've got fucking eye bags now. Dammit!

I went for my Sunday jog as usual, the hot guy is back. Well, he isn't really drool material, but for some reason he does get my attention. I think it's the bitchiness look in his face that attracts. He got there when I was done. What a waste!

On my way back, my brother called me and asked me out for a drink. Unable to say no, I agreed and we met an hour later. My brother, the idiot, made me do the wine tasting, something that I don't do well as I'm more of a beer person compared to a wine person. After the whole embarrassing situation, we got away drinking and talking about some of the project that we are working on and the required input or roping the needed talent into the business to get things going. 

Half way through, my wise brother decides to create a conversation with our server for the evening and then leaves me with him. And that guy tries to hit on me instead, but he wasn't daring to be flirtatious enough. Instead, I ended up giving him free advice on marketing strategy, something I normally charge by the hour.

My whole weekend is gone and here I am ranting at this hour while I have a flight to catch tomorrow morning. I do see myself running after my plane again. I only hope it doesn't leave me behind.

Expensive Bastard

So I was talking to mOnkeybOy the other day, asking him about a particular brand of shoes that I saw which was dirt cheap. Along the conversation, it was established that I'm brand conscious whore who is sucked into the whole branded stuff shit. I guess I'm a victim of my own profession.

Not satisfied, I went home that day after work and was rummaging my wardrobe trying to find something I own that didn't have a label on it. It was so depressing to know that I successfully failed there as I could not find anything without a freaking label. 

Feeling down, I tried to talk to another friend who only had to rub things in further by saying that some of the things I own, could actually feed a few families for a couple of months somewhere in Africa. Buggers!

This got me thinking if I should like auction off some of my watches, the many pairs of shoes, suits that I choose to no longer wear. Probably donate all those shirts, t-shirts, pants - but what for, it's not like it would change anything. In fact, by not getting all these way over priced stuff that exploit and use cheap labour from some third world country, I do include Malaysia as a third world country as the politicians here are sub mediocre, many would be jobless and not have the capabilities to feed their families.

Likewise, I was having a conversation a while ago with a friend who tried persuading me to stop smoking, something I picked up after the Jace saga. And I was like,  if no one smokes anymore, what would happen to all the tobacco farmers and their families. They would all loose their source of income and those poor kids; they would be denied so much in life simply because their parent are jobless since no one wants to smoke anymore. As stupid as it sounds, it does make a certain valid point.

Anyways, going back to my obsession, I've decided to sell most of my watches on eBay. I've to now find the time to snap the pictures of, the watches, from my count, four Tag Heuer, three Tissot, three Oris, one Breitling and one Cartier. 

I got tired counting the pairs of shoes that I have, so I might as well just have like a yard sale or something and some have not even been worn before. 

Once, I've sold all of them, I can then, hopefully, afford the Patek Philippe or Panerai that I've got my eyes set on. Or, I wouldn't mind receiving it as a birthday gift too

Idiocracy Peak

When I was in school and studied differentiation, I was thought that every quadratic curve had either a maximum or minimum point, depending on the equation. Later, I was introduced to binomial distribution which would normally form a bell curve if the sample is normal and the function, f(x) > 0. With this in mind, I was always under the impression that there is a peak for everything, and after that point, it would move downwards again. This thought of mine seemed correct in my mind until I met my current manager.

What happened in the office today is that one of the bigger bosses, worried about his bonus, decided to send out an email with regards to the DSO of most of the clients as his bonus payout would be pretty much be determined by the cash flow of the company rather than the balance sheet or P&L statement. It does make sense to distribute bonus looking at the cash flow as it determines how much cash the organization has. 

So, this email basically gets sent out, a clear indication that the credit control team isn't doing what they're paid for; else the DSO figures would not look that bad.

In the mean time, one of my clients so happened to send me an email earlier in the day concerning a dispute in their invoice; the numbers in the invoice and the monthly summary didn't tally. It's like the monthly summary says that X number of services were performed while the invoice stated X+n. I then forwarded this to my finance team, as those wankers are the ones who prepare the invoice based on the summary provided by the operations team to check on the dispute.

While at it, since the earlier mentioned email by the boss was sent, the finance manager shot me an email asking me to verify some outstanding number on this particular account. Upon looking, I did inform the manager that it was impossible for this account to be reflected as a bad paymaster and the amount owed shown on the report was ridiculous. It was running on a four fold higher figure compared to their actual annual consumption. I therefore requested for the data to be validated as it is very clear that there is an error.

As the finance manager and I were working on the ridiculous numbers churned out by the system, my smart-ass manager has to intervene trying to show himself working after hours. This idiot, not sure if he knew what we were talking about, decides to barge in halfway and asks me to get the client to provide images of their payment. Like what the fuck for?

The problem here lies in the internal application where its churning out incorrect numbers. Even if the client wee to produce images of all their previous payment, the amount paid versus the amount owed will not tally. What would be solved? The DSO will still look bad as it will be still capturing an owed amount. Would it not make sense to fix the bug in the internally to reflect the correct numbers before asking the client to proof that they have made payment. 

Like how dumb is that? And, this isn't the first time this dumb-ass has said such a thing on a similar case.

Later, he went on asking me to be more realistic and to check with the operations team regarding the quantity on the summary versus the invoice.

This is where I fail to see the logic again. It is the standard procedure that finance would issue the invoice based on the summary provided by the operations team. If the figures on the invoice doesn't match with that of the summary, it will only be taken that an error occurred within the finance team whilst preparing the invoice. It is therefore norm to check with the finance as to why the quantity on both the summary and invoice don't tally. 

Now, if the quantity on the invoice and the summary matches, yet there is still a dispute from the client based on their record keeping , then I would agree that the operations team be consulted to isolate and rectify the issue, but this clearly isn't the case.

I find it hard to digest that i'm working with an idiot like this. And whenever he quotes me 'as mentioned earlier' or 'as spoken earlier', I never fail to get bamboozled wondering when the FUCK did he mention or speak to me. 

I've always convinced myself that he has reached the peak of his idiocracy and that he will improve moving forward. 

But what I failed to realize is that I've been comparing him against the wrong curve. He is only fit to be compared against an exponential curve. Silly me! Guess I've been spending too much time with the idiot. 

If only there is a limiting factor to curb his idiocracy and control the exponential growth - highly doubt it though!

I got my HIV screening results earlier. i'm tested negative at this point of time. I'm just glad that I'm no longer in the dark. At least that was a relief to dealing with an idiot.

Don't FUCK With Me!

Okay, here's the deal. 

I am at an emotional low right now; the fact that I don't have the answers that I want in hand is killing me from within. 

And when I'm low, I'm never nice to those who try to be funny with me. I know we didn't start off the on the right foot, things were said and exchanged. I was still very much civilized with you nevertheless. 

If you want to make peace, just apologize or tell me why I would need to apologize to you. Do NOT play dirty tricks and tactics with me. I will trace and track you down. I've gotten your IP address, I know who you are.

Don't FUCK with me or you'll be sorry as I wont spare you this time around. Consider this as a chance to come clean or stay away - do not step on my tail or cross my line. 

I'm really not that nice of a person.

Post Test Blues

Today was the day that I was dreading the most; the medical check this morning and handing over my Bella to my sister. I could not sleep at all last night; was literally tossing and turning on my bed all night long. 

This is how my day practically started with the reminder stuck on my refrigerator held by a magnet.

It's supposed to be a full medical test and I opted to include a HIV screening to just to give me that extra peace of mind, but coming to think about it, it is nothing close to having a peace of mind. The anxiety of knowing that I have to wait for the lab results is just killing me from within. I'm now not sure if all those needles and blood or the test results was the bigger fear factor.

So, after a long time of sitting on my couch and reflecting of god knows what, I pulled myself up and got ready and went out to go for my test and then to KL to meet my sister. At the hospital, I had to go through all the stupid routine and finally I was able to meet the doctor where he was so eagerly waiting to draw my blood. And I swear that the effing syringe was so huge that you could have enough barbiturate in it to sedate an elephant - okay lah, maybe a little over exaggerating, but it was huge nonetheless. The doc sucked so much of blood off me, that it felt like eternity...

I immediately rushed out of the hospital as soon as it was completed and decided to drive away. Along the journey, I could not but help thinking what would the result be like.  The is a 50-50 chance for it to be either way. 

How will it be like if I'm tested positive? What are the things that would change? I'm sure my lifestyle would be effected, but to what degree. How would people who are close to me react? Would my friends start avoiding me as I'm now as good as being poisonous. All these questions were jump pouring into my head at speeds faster than the water falling from the top of Niagara. It is just too much to handle.

The only way I could stop thinking of  it was by stepping on the accelerator and driving like a crazy freak. I called my sister and told her that I'll be get there, fetch her and go to the airport and asked her to book me a flight back to Penang instead of the original plan of staying over and only returning back tomorrow with another friend.

I still can't get it out of my mind, the anxiety is killing me. I am just going to go out for a drink by myself and watch the world pass by. Hopefully I can have a good sleep later to get this off my mind for now until the results are out...

Medical Check

I've got an appointment for a medical tomorrow morning. I already started having nightmares about it since last night. 

Medical checks, should  be limited to not include needles and drawing precious blood off your body. Like who in a right mind would want to be pierced by a freaking needle? And since needles in general are so dangerous, they ought to be totally banned from being used anywhere. 

And drawing of blood, like how barbaric is that? The reason blood flows and circulates inside your body and underneath your skin is so that its not visible to the eye. It has to remain that way. No one should consider extracting blood out, let alone making another person see their blood being sucked out of their body. 

I'm also supposed to fast from this evening for some stupid tests that's been planned for me to become a guinea pig tomorrow, but I'm still snacking on food as I'm so nervous. I have no idea how tonight is going to pass and the ordeal of driving to the hospital tomorrow morning. How I wish I could simply fast forward time just until the whole morning drama is over. 

Why do doctors, nurses and lab technicians have to torture innocent little people so much? I'm so worked up now that I can't sleep and I've ran out of sleeping pills and there is no where I could find codeine at this hour. I guess I should dig my refrigerator to see if I have any cough syrup or my medical box searching for some piriton, either one of these should help me fall asleep.

Also, I'd be handing over my Bella to my sister; feeling kinda sad right now. I do hope to have a good run down to KL for one last time and she'll no longer be mine :(

Pre-Stone Age

I managed to finish work early today and since the skies were perfectly grey, I told myself to just head home and not detour anywhere as I normally do most of the time. I was beginning to feel bored barely five minutes after reaching home. So, I decided to go down to gym at  my place since I was just too lazy to drive out to the gym. 

This would be my first time actually walking into the gym in my apartment though I've been living here for close to four years now. Not too bad as I thought the first time would be around the five year mark when I'm trying to sell this place for something bigger; the much needed space to house all the clutter I collect from my travels and five minute insanity streaks over on Ebay.

Anyways, here I am walking into the gym for the first time and the sight was a shocker, there were only two treadmills of which one wasn't working and the order looking like it was going to spoil anytime soon itself. Two disgusting looking bicycles, like how could anyone use them, the dirtiest public toilets you can find in downtown Kuala Lumpur somehow feels cleaner and newer. And there was this other machine which I had no idea what the hell it was as I've never seen anything like it before, maybe it was something used pre-Flinstones. Thankfully there were some weights that looked decent and not fall apart when you tried to lift them.

Somehow, I managed to break a sweat there and also did a 5km run on the mill and rushed out of the place gasping for air as it gets quite stuffy. I so appreciate my gym membership now and I don't ever see myself going back, not even when I have potential buyers for my apartment when it's up for sale in the future. A strong worded letter to the management is required, nevertheless, which I shall draft when my manager pisses me off, and I'm sure it won't be later than after lunch tomorrow.

I'm so glad tomorrow is Friday and the weekend is around though I wouldn't be getting much of a weekend. My childhood friend called me earlier this afternoon and asked me to accompany her with her two kids for the Disney On Ice show tomorrow evening. I'm not sure now if I'm looking forward for the show or being able to team up with the boys and drive their mother crazy. 

Teaming up with the boys would certainly be more fun, and these are my rare chances of being able to spoil kids, so I shall make full use of the chance available.

Bye Bye Bella

I had been toying with the idea of finding a new home for my weekend playmate, Bella, for some time now. There were a few offers that came along the way after I came back from the UK, but since I was kinda pre-occupied, I just shrugged most of the offers away by giving the potential buyers a real cold shoulder.

When I was in Singapore last weekend, I was discussing this matter over with a friend of mine on the prospect of maintaining two cars for which one is hardly used most of the time. It does make a logical sense to let her go as it'll help me save some moolah and channel the funds from there to better use - going for more trips. I can smell Egypt around the corner - woohoo!

And so, I told myself that I'll put her up for sale this week once I've sorted out the compensation package with my future employer. As I was drafting the ad to find her a new home earlier this evening, my sister gave me a call. 

After spending what felt like hours catching up with her, she did express intend to buy herself a car now that she broke up with her boyfriend thus loosing the free rides. That's when I just offered her my Bella instead for which she said yes without a hesitant. I am now in a mix feel mode, I'm sad that my Bella will soon be gone but at the same time I'm happy that she will be going to my sister, so I still stand a chance to take her for a spin once in a while or hit the pedal to the metal along the expressway and smoke some rubber and annoy many wankers who drive so fucking slow on the right lane and hog the road as if it belong to their grandfathers.

In any event, I will be driving her down to KL this weekend to pass her together with the ownership details to my sister for her to do a ownership transfer. As this could potentially be my last chance to smoke some rubber and enjoy the handling of the 147 for a long time, I shall fully enjoy the sheer driving pleasure by the Italian make.

After the weekend, I'll officially be owning only one car, my Suzi.
With that thought in mind, I'm now thinking of what should now be my secondary ride. Another Alfa Romeo, or a Golf GTI or the Mini Cooper...